Techware Labs Giveaway **This One**
Alright, here are the juicy details, just like you wanted:
The giveaway is really simple to win. In fact, it requires virtually no skill at all. All you have to do is fulfill the following criteria:
-Be a member of the Techware Labs forums
-Have at least 10 posts (posting spam will disqualify you from the giveaway)
-Reply once to this thread, saying something funny, or telling how badly you need to win this (ex: Lightning hit me when I was installing my CD burner, and I can only deliver my medical history on a CD-R, so I'm going to die if I don't win this.)
Legal stuff: Techware Labs retains the right to use its discretion at any point for making decisions about validity of an entry, etc. There is a limit of one entry per person. A valid email address must be used in order to be qualified.
I will post the updated prize list later tonight.
We all need free stuff. We all could benefit from free stuff. I for instance need free stuff because I made the mistake of drinking and upgrading. Nothing ruins a PCB faster than a quality lager. At least the beer was good... ;)
my mom's broke
my dad's broke
my family's broke
my head is broken also...
well heres a classic blonde joke
theres this blonde girl that goes to school
on the first day...
she got home and told her mom,
Girl: "mommy mommy, we learned ABC today and everyone got to C but i got to A, B, C, D, E, F.. F"
"Is it because im blonde?"
Mom: "Yes dear, its because you are blonde"
Second day, she got home and told her mommy,
Girl: "Mommy Mommy, we learned 123 today and everyone got to 3 and i got to 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8... 8"
"Is it because I am blonde?"
Mom: "Yes dear, its because you are blonde"
Third day, she got home and told her mommy,
Girl: "Mommy Mommy, we went swimming today and everyone's chest has no breast but i have 36D"
"Is it because I am blonde?"
Mom: "No dear, it is not because you are blonde"
"It is because you are 25 years old!"
I deserve some free stuff because of the four painful years I spent doing tech support for the _dumbest_ userbase you will ever find. Public schools. I deserve free stuff because I put up with questions like "how come when I copy my files from my CD to my floppy it says there is not enough space on the disk?" and "wait you want me to _click_ OK?" and listening to the mac users "theres _TWO_ mouse buttons!?!?". AND for all the grief I took when we took away all the teachers color inkjets and put in about 15k$ worth of b/w Laser printers, and about that much in 3 color lasers, "WHY ARE YOU TAKING MY PRINTER"... of course I was the one who actually go TAKE the printers away from everyone, the boss just made the new rule! So then _I_ was the bad guy from all the teachers views. BAH. And lets not forget the time I installed the whole new lab myself (dont kid yourself- this means putting together 30+ computers from a pile of parts we didn't order from MFR's we built ours) only to realize we recieved a bad batch of motherboards and I would have to go unplug every single one and send them back. (true story :mad: )
In any event, I deserve free stuff for my years of abused techy-dom. and putting up with so much $h!t from so many teachers who thought they knew more than me. To them I say: You'll get yours!!! >:)
DOOD GIMME GIMME GIMME please?
Man I cannot lie and say I am in deperate need, or that my rig sucks for I love it. But the main reason why I need somthing "in the video department" is that I am forced to have to use a 4200ti and listen to my girl yell at me day in and day out that I spend to much time on the PC when I work from home on the PC *LOL* IF any of you have to put up with that hell please understand this! That alone entitles me to somthing decent, that and I am forced at the moment to put up with a $129.99 4200ti from PNY, I had to literally scrap pennies stuck to gum off the sidewalk to be able to afford it because my girl gives me a call about 2 weeks ago saying she needs whatever cash I have and not to question her, so I spotted her with everything I had "money I was saving for a 9700 or at least a 4600" and the next thing I knew I had two new 4 wheelers in my lap! Well to say the least I was super friggin happy, but now I seriously lack in my video department :( The rest of my rig is all sick equipment for this month at least, but the video is just not up to par with everything else :( Please help a poor soul that has a girl that takes all his PC toy money away :( Please I really need a good card or somthing. ALso note that I am a newer user that is on here all the time and try's to keep all the rooms going, you will see my dragon icon in about every room and see daily posts from me, I also tell people to go on here all the time "buttkiss buttkiss" *LOL* but really I do :) Also I write pretty good reviws with allot of grammer errors *L* And you wanna read some funny stuff..?? Well here goes hehe :D
"Three mice are sitting at a bar in a pretty rough neighborhood late at
trying to impress each other with how tough they are.
One mouse orders a large scotch, slams the glass onto the bar, turns to
second mouse and says, "When I see a mousetrap, I lie on my back and
off with my foot. When the bar comes down, I catch it in my teeth,
press it twenty times to work up an appetite, and then make off with
The second mouse orders up two tumblers of Jim Beam, slurps them down
quick succession, slamming each glass into the bar, turns to the first
mouse,and replies: "Yeah, well when I see rat poison, I collect as much
can, take it home, grind it up to a powder, and add it to my coffee
morning so I can get a good buzz going for the rest of the day."
The macho mice then turn to the third mouse, Butch, to see what he has
say about it. Butch lets out a long sigh and says to the first two, "I
have time for this crap. I've gotta go home and screw the cat.""
The game of choice for unemployed people or maintenance level workers
The game of choice for frontline workers is football.
The game of choice for middle management is tennis.
The game of choice for CEOs and executives is golf.
Conclusion: The higher up on the corporate ladder you are, the smaller
your balls are.
Subject: IT'S A MAN'S WORLD
COOL THINGS ABOUT BEING A MAN
1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview
2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
3. Your last name stays put.
4. The garage is all yours.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
10. Same work .. more pay.
11. Wrinkles-add character.
12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch
13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
17. One mood, ALL the damn time.
18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase
20. You can open all your own jars
21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
22. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without
thinking "He must be mad at me."
27. No maxi-pads.
28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just
might become lifelong friends
29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a
31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.
32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
34. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
35. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
36. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on
24th, in 15 minutes.
37. The world is your urinal.
Ten Things men know for sure about women. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.
10. They have breasts
THE SEVEN DEGREES OF BLOND:
A married couple is asleep when the telephone rang at two in the
morning. The blonde wife picks up the telephone, listens a moment
and shouts, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hangs
up. The husband says, "Who was that?" The wife says, "I don't know.
Somebody asking if the coast is clear."
2nd DEGREE: Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror, and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact. The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out
and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door, she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, ! the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The
boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it." The blonde screams, "Shut
up, you're next!"
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She
proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says, "OK,
what's the capital of Wisconsin?"
The blonde says, "W."
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was
A: "Is it mine?"
A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident.
Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.
"My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK, ma'am?" "Why, yes, officer, I'm just fine" the blonde c! hirped. "Well, how in the world did this
happen?" the officer asked, surveying the mess. "Officer, it was the
strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to
the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I swerved to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and ...." "Uh, ma'am," says the officer said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener."
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house
ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels, and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered, and ! dropped to her steps with her face in
her hands. "I can't believe this! I come home to find all my possessions
stolen," she moans, "I call the police for help, and they send me a BLIND cop
THE WORST PART OF THE LAST JOKES ARE "I AM 100% BLONDE AND IN 5 YEARS I WILL BE BALD LIKE MY DAD AND HAVE A FRIGGIN LITTLE CEASAR RING AROUND MY HEAD AND WILL HAVE TO HIDE IN A CAVE AND WILL NEVER SEE A PC AGAIN FOR MY SHINY HEAD WILL REFLECT TO MUCH LIGHT AND CAUSE GLARE ON THE SCREEN SO PLEASE MAKE MY LAST YEARS ON A PC HAPPY WITH SOMTHING GOOD "ESPECIALLY IN THE VIDEO DEPT. :)
Hey also if you are giving away a 4600ti silver from triplex I would be honored for I use a platinum soyo board and it would match perfect! I tried to deal with the company and it was slow and annoying so I did not buy from them, but if I happened to get ahold of one I would be super happy and show off awsome pics of my all silver pcb rig with silver ram stick, silver mobo and silver video card hint hint hint hehe :)
Unfortuneatly, I would be a bit embarrased to tell yall what I am running just over conversation...but being that there is finally gonna be a contest here...ill spill it...once the prizes are up you guys will see that I am probalby the most desperate user on TWL...no joke at all...haha, just wait. To give ya a preview, im runnin a frickin packard bell...
So, there are two giveaway threads going around now that I know of. Is this part of the requirements? Track down all giveaway threads and post in them?
This isn't going to be as easy as I thought.
This is the real prize thread!
If you posted in the other thread please re-post here.
Confessions of a techie.
***Stands up and looks around slowly***
He... heellloo, My name is Raven, and I'm a ... tech-aholic.
I've been addicted to the "green PCB" for over three years now. This evil has taken everything from me, and I can't get away from it. I've lost most of my friends, my wife has left me and my kids hate me.
This addiction started with something small, a 486 with a 24.4 modem. One day a "friend" of mine gave me an AOL disk, and it was all over. "The first 5 hours are free" he said. After the 5 hours I needed MORE. Then came Cable-Internet, and I was lost. I fought it as hard as I could but I was always drawn back to the blinking green lights of a cable modem, the comforting sound of a purring hard drive. The soft glow of the monitor was like the touch of a lovers hand.
The thrill and elation of fraggin a pixelized warrior, being a conqueror of many lands, seeing my enemies crumble and fall. These became my reality, my keyboard was my shield and my mouse was my sword. I would stand proud over my many victories, only to see them fade and disapear. I was always in search of my next battle. Never seeing that I was slowly falling into a dark oblivion... I am now a fallen warrior, with a rusted blade.
... First it was gamming... Then my so called friend visited me again hooked me on Mirc, Kazaa and Morpheous. "Try it" he intoned, "all you have to do is press "I agree". Little did I know I was signing over another part of my soul. I felt like a god, nothing was out of my reach, I could access any information I wanted, MP3's, DVD's, books, patches... it was all at my fingertips. But I always needed more hard drive space, I would do anything for that next Megabyte. I was slave to those all encompasing platers. I even sold the family dog, to afford a 15gig drive...
Sometimes I can't get thru the day without having to burn an MP3 cd... it doesn't even matter what it is. Yep, even a Kenny G cd... It's like an itch I cannot scratch.
***hangs head in shame***
I'm thankful for my true friends that stayed with me, and forced me to realize my addiction. I am now having to go thru the a Cat5, internet withdrawl. I sometimes have flashbacks of being a soldier of fortune, or a knight of old, and the shakes are sometime to great to handle. I'm learning speak normally again, no more lol, l33t, newb... It will be a long road to recovery but with my friends and family I'm sure to make it.
Please favor me with a gift to help me on my recovery and to show that not all technology is bad...
Signed a lonely man in a dark room sorounded by obsoletness...
Hope you like....
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