New element found
 

HEAVIEST ELEMENT FOUND!

The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered!

The element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or
electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0.

However, it does have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75
vice-neutrons, and 111 assistant vice-neutrons, giving it an atomic
mass of 312.  These 312 particles are held together in the nucleus by
a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles
called morons.

Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert.  However, it can
be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction with which it
comes in contact.  According to the discoverer, a tiny amount of
Administratium caused one reaction to take over 4 days to complete.
It would normally occur in less than 1 second.

Administratium has a normal half-life of approximately 3 years.  At
this time, it does not actually decay, but instead undergoes
reorganization in which assistant neutrons, vice-neutrons, and
assistant vice-neutrons exchange place.  Some studies have shown that
the atomic mass actually increased after each reorganization.

Researchers at other labs indicated that Administratium occurs
naturally in the atmosphere.  It tends to concentrate at certain
points, such as universities, government agencies, large corporations,
and schools.  The element can be found in the newest, best-appointed,
and best-maintained buildings.

Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any
level of concentration, and can easily destroy any productive
reactions where it is allowed to accumulate.  Attempts are being made
to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent
irreversible damage, but results are not promising.  They will,
however, keep fighting to control the spread of this deadly element.

Re: New element found
 

Hahaha! Here I thought it was a serious article... ;D

Re: New element found
 

Pretty funny, although I also thought it was a serious post at first.

Re: New element found
 

Samo, guess "morons" was the first hint I noticed
really funny  ;D

Re: New element found
 

Heh, I kind of guessed it was fake after "Administratium," and was pretty sure after it had "no protons or electrons."  Got some nice hits in there though :p.

Re: New element found
 

i first thought it was serious, then had doubts about the name, morons, then it looked serious again, but then 'assistant' neutrons didn't sound right. if i knew the US school system the 3 years thing mite of helped as well

good post ;)

Re: New element found
 

this is quite fun ;D, i nearly laughed my a** off, but i´f youl´d know the austrian school system......

Re: New element found
 

No damn it! IT WAS A REAL POST! IT JUST HAD TO BE!


It was real I tell ya.......REEEEAAAAAL!

Re: New element found
 

Hook, line & . . . .

Love those type of stories, they make the ol braincell active for wee bit

Re: New element found
 

Yeah, but I'm not so sure it isn't refering to 'Administration', they just mispelled it, you know, the political kind we elect here in the US every 4 years.