Joke of the day...

Thought I would start a new joke thread... here is the first

Q: What is the difference between a computer and an air conditioner???

A: Both work great until you open windows!!!

PC Pot

A Dell employee got busted for pot in Manhattan recently. President Bush and many conservative lawmakers are surprisingly upset, as they have always pushed the view that marijuanna is a Gateway drug.

hehe
this one i like

Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?

Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.

[MIK3]

Let's pick on Pentium here:

Q: What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on Pentiums?
A: The warning label.

TOP TEN NEW INTEL SLOGANS FOR THE PENTIUM

9.9999973251 It's a FLAW, Dammit, not a Bug
8.9999163362 It's the new math
7.9999414610 Nearly 300 Correct Opcodes
6.9999831538 You Don't Need to Know What's Inside
5.9999835137 Redefining the PC -- and Mathematics As Well
4.9999999021 We Fixed It, Really
3.9998245917 Division Considered Harmful
2.9991523619 Why Do You Think They Call It *Floating* Point? 1.9999103517 We're Looking for a Few Good Flaws
0.9999999998 The Errata Inside

Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant?
A: A mad scientist.

You guys have to see these cartoons hahahaha http://www.oddtodd.com/cartoons.html

I got this one in an email today, I loved it

What the difference between a book and the French?






The book has a spine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHA I got this in an email also this morning Some of us may find it very very funny like myself and some may not so if your pro france then don't read it!!!

Pardonnez les duplicationes.


"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these
drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by
prostitutes."
---Mark Twain

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one
behind me." --- General George S. Patton

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your
accordion."
--Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
--- Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure"
---Jacques Chirac, President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right."
---Rush Limbaugh,

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is
sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
--- Regis Philbin

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any
better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit
outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more
stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I
don't
know."
--- P.J O'Rourke (1989)

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the
1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have
the
face for it."
---John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he
hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French,
people."
--Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us! get
Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans
out
of France!"
---Jay Leno

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into
Paris under a German flag."
--David Letterman

How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb?
O! ne. He holds the bulb and all of Europe revolves around him.

Next time there's a war in Europe,




the loser keeps France.

rock on!

[vee_ess]

Those are awesome. I am still wondering why France has the power of veto in the U.N. since they have never been productive.

Another two I heard recently:

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?
No one knows - nobody has ever tried.

Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Elysees?
So the Germans could march in the shade.

hahaha those are great