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Old 01-16-2004, 03:52 PM
StinkyMojo StinkyMojo is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Black Mesa Research Facility
Posts: 2,935
Default Why Men are just Happier People

I recieved this funny email from my dad a couple days ago, almost all are true and funny to think about.. Please excuse the "> >".. didnt feel like deleting each one

> > WHY MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE
> >
> > What do you expect from such simple creatures?
> >
> > Your last name stays put.
> >
> > The garage is all yours.
> >
> > Wedding plans take care of themselves.
> >
> > Chocolate is just another snack.
> >
> > You can be president.
> >
> > You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
> >
> > You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park.
> >
> > Car mechanics tell you the truth.
> >
> > The world is your urinal.
> >
> > You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just
too
> > icky.
> >
> > You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
> >
> > Same work, more pay.
> >
> > Wrinkles add character.
> >
> > Wedding dress -- $5000; tux rental -- $100.
> >
> > People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
> >
> > The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
> >
> > New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
> >
> > One mood, ALL the time.
> >
> > Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
> >
> >
> > You know stuff about tanks.
> >
> > A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
> >
> > You can open all your own jars.
> >
> > You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
> >
> > If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
> >
> > Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
> >
> > Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
> >
> > You almost never have strap problems in public.
> >
> > You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
> >
> > Everything on your face stays its original color.
> >
> > The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
> >
> > You only have to shave your face and neck.
> >
> > You can play with toys all your life.
> >
> > Your belly usually hides your big hips.
> >
> > One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
> >
> > You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
> >
> > You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
> >
> > You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
> >
> >
> > You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45
> > minutes.
> >
> > No wonder men are happier!
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